it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
i just sent this text using only my big toe
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
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