hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
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