New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
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