Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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