Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Randomize