Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
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