When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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