No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
I have tasted many bathrooms
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize
