David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
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