Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
Randomize
