Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
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