Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
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