That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize
