We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Randomize
