It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Randomize
