I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
