I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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