I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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