Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
Randomize
