i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
You smell like a Billy Joel song
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
