By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Randomize
