But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
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