The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
