I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
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