Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
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By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
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Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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