I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
