I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
