We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize