Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
