I feel like I'm in dance class right now
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
I don't think brook has ever known best
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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