OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Nicole vs. Life
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
