JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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