hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
