Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need Xanax blowdarts
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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