you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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