Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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