Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
