If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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