dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
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