I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
