Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Randomize
