Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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