Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize