physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
Randomize
