i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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