We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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