we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
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