in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Randomize