The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
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