Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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