I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize
